“OW! MY ASS” Is Much Easier To Scream Than “OW! MY COCCYX!”

This post is a long time coming, and I apologize for this.  I was under the impression that a fantastic photo would be provided, and that photo was going to be the cornerstone of this blog post.

Alas, the photo I desired (of me flying through the air, one hand holding an iPhone, one hand flailing about, and one ass about to slam square into the pavement) never materialized in my inbox.

So, this photo of some fantastic SOCKS (#socks) will have to suffice:

Look at those socks (On the right. That's me. And my socks). Photo from www.brittanyvervillephotography.com

Continue reading “OW! MY ASS” Is Much Easier To Scream Than “OW! MY COCCYX!”

SOCK and RACE REPORT – PVD adventures.



I got a box o’ socks from my friends at People For Bikes.  Well, specifically, probably one friend.  Also included in the box was a collection of COFFEE.

This is great because I am a person who likes bikes, and I like pushing the agenda of a bicycle as a fantastic mode of transportation.  I also like socks and coffee.

I grabbed two pairs of socks, a few packages of coffee, my camping stove and bike racing shit and hopped in Curtis’ car and OFF WE ZIPPED to Providence (we could not take bikes to Providence, as this was an instance in which a car was a better mode of transportation).

Continue reading SOCK and RACE REPORT – PVD adventures.

I Need Socks

Are you a company that has your logo on socks?  Are you a sock company that is sitting on a pile of extra-large (suitable for size fifteen US feet) socks?  Would you like photos of your socks to fly about the Internet and as advertisements in publications?

I can make this happen.  If you give me your socks.

This is a real life advertisement in Cyclocross Magazine featuring my legs and my socks.

If you cannot tell, I am wearing a lovely pair of Zanconato socks.  I won them in a raffle.

Here is a better photo of my legs and the socks that I am wearing at the bottom of my legs:

These could be your socks.

This photo is grainy, as I took it off of Colin Reuter’s Twitter page.

If you give me some socks, I will wear them at all cyclocross races.  I will also blog about your socks.  I will give them an honest review.  I am an honest man.  If I review the socks, and they suck*, I will say so.  I will send the socks back to you, and you can take the shitty socks and burn them (as that is what one does with socks that suck).

I will talk about your socks incessantly on the Twitter, to the detriment of losing followers who are tired of hearing me talk about how great (or how shitty) your socks are.  I don’t use Facebook very often, but I will start using it to talk about your socks.

I will put socks on my dog and take cute photos.  Maybe even post them to Instagram.  Are you into sexy photos of skinny, hairy guys wearing nothing but SOCKS?

Well, that’s good, but don’t push your luck.  I will probably** not send you photos of me wearing nothing but socks.

Contact me at ryanneedssomefuckingsocks@exit17.net if you have some socks that you’d like to give me.

*Please don’t send me shitty socks.  Let’s not waste our time here.
** I might.