New England has finally grown a pair
So this was the lamest November ever. Last year, we had a freak snowstorm at the end of October and I recall dealing with frozen shift cables during a post-Thanksgiving cross ride. There were SNOWSTORMS and MARAUDERING HORDES and INVADING GOTHS and SWORD BATTLES and all that cool shit that goes along with a badass New England November.
And then this year the greatest region of the world went all pussy on us, and it was friggin’ 60 degrees a few days ago. SIXTY DEGREES. IN NOVEMBER. Sorostitutes were walking around with their Bermuda tans, mini-skirts and early-autumn attire. Sure, it was great, but it was so wrong, out of season and weird. At this point the male population of Durham should be dealing with the fact that the mini-skirts are gone until Bust ‘Em Out Day, and all we’re going to see now is chunky sweaters and Uggs. The weather totally threw the natural rythym of campus off.
NO LONGER, BITCHES!
I woke up this morning with Ally, planning on the usual Friday Thom-and-Ryan Portsmouth BNG jaunt and gave him a call.
“We riding?” I said.
“Dude, it’s fucking snowing.” I hung up the phone and immediatley hit F8 on my shitty old Powerbook to bring up the weather widget. Ally opened the blinds. Snow! 16 degrees!
Yaaaaaay winter is here! And I finally get to race in some snow this weekend! It’s going to be cold as Regan’s black heart and I’m totally not used to riding in conditions other than totally dry, unstereotypical cross ones. Regardless, this weekend is going to be badass and sweet.
Hopefully there’s Iced Earth on the playlist. Otherwise the race promoters are going to have to deal with a very cold, very angry, and very metal-hungry Ryan Kelly.
its not snowing down here…
and your sorry ass bitching self will be back to the upper 40s and 50s for next week…
the bitch that’s new england winter is being an f’n tease this year…
shits either gonna get major wacked in Jan and Feb or we really gonna be wondering if KL’s gonna re-post the whole global “warming” shizzle again…
Windy as Richard Fries on the final lap or Alan Attwood at the start in a pissy mood…
Talk’n clipboard throwing ranting screaming tirade….
It’s not “shizzle” you fucking moron. Climate change in the form of a warming climate is for real. Even G-W (and I don’t mean willi) admits it now.
Get with the fucking program, sasquatch. You all have fun out there traipsing around in the cold, I’ll be circling the Harvard indoor track thinking happy thoughts, like “i don’t have to clean a bike or clothes or shoes or dethaw my feet and hands after this race”.
“hey, you gotta feed the monkey somehow” – a quote from Al Donahue